My friend Michelle posted some photos of herself, her husband, and her baby son on facebook the other day. They're living in San Francisco - so you can see the Golden Gate bridge, Chinatown, and the dark green-blue Bay in the background of her photographs. It looked so beautiful - the colors, their glowing faces, and just what a particular sort of place San Francisco is. I confess: I felt jealous.
It made me start feeling restless again... don't I want some adventure? don't I want to explore all the beautiful places in the world? huh? Why, four times now, have I chosen to be in Chicago, when I could've gone somewhere else? (1) I came back here after my pastor gig in western Massachusetts, (2) I took a job here - at a law firm - while I thought about whether I could do ministry again, (3) I chose to get my MDiv here, and (4) I chose to do my Anglican Year here.
I had good reasons. My family all lives here (for now, anyway - my brother and his girlfriend might move to St. Louis), I grew up here, I have friends all over the place, I love the Midwestern, gritty urban, funky artsy, richly diverse culture here, and - I find myself wanting to say - um, it's beautiful.
Duh. Every place is beautiful.
Yeah, Chicago is my spiritual geography. A la Kathleen Norris. When I first read Dakota I was jealous of her, too. I wanted a grandmother's house in the middle of nowhere where I could go write about interesting things. That's probably also why I love Annie Dillard so much: she writes about what happens in particular, small places - sand storms, children getting burned, bugs and frogs in a pond.
Sometimes, the Lake, the skyline, the El, Lake Shore Drive, etc., bore me. They're burned on my brain. But here I am. I know it all so well. A guy I was introduced to the other day down at the diocesan offices, a community organizer (who was mighty cute, I might add), said to me, "You should do what you know. You should probably go back to Hyde Park if you want to do something effective." I was talking to him about starting a house church (crazy me), and I think I've moved away from that idea, but what he said has stuck with me (and not just because he looked like a JCrew model).
And maybe that's even what this blog has been for me - a chronicling of my spiritual geography this year, at Seabury. I'm obsessed with places and objects and images. So, if I end up in Forest Heights, Lake Grove, Oak Plains, Pretty Hills, or whatever Chicago suburb, maybe I'll do the same thing, there.
Sorry this blog has been so much about the FUTURE lately. I should follow my own advice and write about where I am, now.
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